I Hate Saturday Night

No. No. I don't hate Saturday night because I'm single (currently in a good relationship anyway. yeay). You know, that cheesy kind of single(s) who made a noise about how sad and pathetic their love life when the weekdays end. Poor things.
I hate Saturday night because the most annoying crowd are on the road, you know what I mean?
Especially here, in Tasikmalaya, a home for 719,528 people but not much leisure activity we can do in the weekend. Some people might take a short trip to Bandung (2-3 hours driving), some just stay home-doing nothing-family time kinda things-or simply just broke, some might go to malls or cafes, and some might just hanging out doing nothing-on the street-with their motor clubs. Frankly, the last group is what annoys me the most. As if  their existence is not annoying enough, a lot of morons, which are three people who get a ride on a two-wheeled vehicle together, spilled all over the road. Driving foolishly and put no helmet. My God. Their existence is lowering the IQ of the whole nation. Well, that's make this phenomenon into social problem.

Anyway, I hate Saturday night because it's make me realize that the more I grow up, the more I become socially awkward. I feel anxious and uncomfortable among the crowd, strangers or not. Sad, isn't it? I'm not a social butterfly to begin with but still, feeling lonely but nothing you can do about it is sucks. Being an ambivert with minimum quality of social skill is disaster. This thought is going on and off and on in my mind lately. What I supposed to do? I'd like to mingle like I used to do in my early 20s but doing it in regular basis is torture me at this point. Well, 'torture' is a harsh word but seriously, why is it so hard to approach someone new, create a topic out of thin air or say something funny? 
I can deal with being alone but feeling lonely is another stuff and it hurts.

Oh well, this might be just the quarter life crisis: young, insecure and depressed.

Illustration belongs to Marzi


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